There is no shortage of psychopaths in the world. What surprises most people is their ability to attract normal, healthy people to them. While people cannot always explain what drew them to a dangerous person or someone with a dark personality, there are a few common factors that play into the attraction.
They Simply Look Better
Psychopaths are not naturally more attractive than other people, but researchers at St. Louis’s Washinton University have discovered that psychopaths use their personal appearance as a social lure to further their personal agendas. They do this through their creative use of makeup, clothing and hair to make themselves look more attractive.
Power is Appealing
When you hear the term “psychopath,” you may think of a killer. While most killers are psychopaths, not all psychopaths are violent. There are many functioning members of society who are psychopaths. Not only are they functional at their jobs, but they often wind up in positions of power. They crave power and want to have control over the people around them. Many people are drawn to people who are in power because they believe having friends in high places will ultimately bring them some benefit.
Amazing First Impressions
Psychopaths don’t necessary feel emotions the same way as normal people, but they excel at mimicking and acting. They watch other people and then use their skills to make sure that they are charming and draw people to them. They are known or making a positive first impression by being alert, friendly and easy to talk with. They don’t seem odd at all as they embody the picture of happy, well-adjusted people. They are witty, articulate and even enjoyable to be around. That all changes when the dark personality eventually start showing through, but it certainly explains why so many people are initially drawn to them.
The Darkness is Hidden and Disguised Under a Caring Front
Psychopaths are acutely aware of what people think of them, and they strive to make sure that they are always liked and respected. They are likable, smart and thoughtful. They are invested in charitable activities like feeding the hungry, helping people find jobs and stamping out poverty. They want to be recognized for promoting peace because this makes it more difficult for people to seek out, find and ultimately believe the truth about their character. The bottom line is that they want people to like them, so they give people a reason to like and even love them.
They are a Reflection of You
Spending so much time studying other people allows psychopaths to excel at saying what people want to hear, knowing how to make them laugh and understanding what they need. People are innately drawn to others who are like them, and psychopaths excel at mirroring back what is inside you. This makes them irresistible to most people. Being around them simply feels good. Only after they have drawn people into their net will the control, manipulation and other dangerous tendencies begin to surface.
Many intelligent people fall victim to psychopaths. It’s important to learn how to recognize them. Be wary of anyone who is simply too charming and smooth talking. They are also self-centered, believe they are more important than others and are prone to boredom. They lie and cheat with ease, and they aren’t concerned about consequences if they are caught. Manipulating others for personal gain, they don’t show remorse. Emotional responses to events are shallow, and they don’t feel pity. Risk-takers by nature, they always have someone to blame for their failings. Learning how to spot a psychopath early on can help you avoid these dangerous people.
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Ramona King is a family counselor and guest author at www.topcounselingschools.org, where she has contributed guides to top-rated online counseling degree programs.