There was an old person of Shoreham,
Whose habits were marked by decorum;
He bought an Umbrella,
And sate in the cellar,
Which pleased all the people of Shoreham.
There was an old man of Dumbree,
Who taught little owls to drink tea;
For he said, 'To eat mice,
Is not proper or nice'
That amiable man of Dumbree.
There was an old person of Wilts,
Who constantly walked upon stilts;
He wreathed them with lilies,
That elegant person of Wilts.
There was an old man whose remorse,
Induced him to drink Caper Sauce;
For they said, 'If mixed up,
With some cold claret-cup,
It will certainly soothe your remorse!'
There was an old person of Cassel,
Whose nose finished off in a tassel;
But they call'd ou, 'Oh well!--
Don't it look like a bell!'
Which perplexed that old person of Cassel.
There was a young person of Janina,
Whose uncle was always a fanning her;
When he fanned off her head,
She smiled sweetly, and said,
'You propitious old person of Janina!'
There was an old person of Ware,
Who rode on the back of a bear:
When they ask'd, - 'Does it trot?'--
He said 'Certainly not!
He's a Moppsikon Floppsikon bear!'
There was an old person of Dean,
Who dined on one pea, and one bean;
For he said, 'More than that,
Would make me too fat,'
That cautious old person of Dean.
There was an old person of Dundalk,
Who tried to teach fishes to walk;
When they tumbled down dead,
He grew weary, and said,
'I had better go back to Dundalk!'
There was a young person of Ayr,
Whose head was remarkably square:
On the top, in fine weather,
She wore a gold feather;
Which dazzled the people of Ayr.