Did you ever listen to someone give you an acknowledgement that sounded fake and gave you a visceral response of “That was just baloney”?
Compare that to someone who tells you how much they appreciate the work you have done on a project and point out specific situations where what you did mattered. And your internal response was “That really feels good.”
How do you know the difference? Both are saying positive things to you. What makes one real and the other a big, major fake?
Our bodies are great ways to check if what is being said has depth and meaning. The place we usually feel what is real from what is wrong is in the gut. You know if you start to feel that rumble or a wave of distaste that comes over you.
Once we are adults we don’t pay enough attention to what our bodies are telling us. Oh sure, we want our bodies to look good, taut and healthy. That is not what I am talking about.
I mean the visceral reactions we often push aside because it may mean conflict.
In our leadership development program, Total Leadership Connections, we talk about how we cannot ever, and that means ever forget to listen to our body-mind. It is, surprise, surprise - connected. And the more we listen to that intuitive part and check with how our bodies are responding the more we are in charge of the next steps we take in our relationships.
If you are on the receiving end of acknowledgement please simply say “thank you.”
And if you “feel” the acknowledgement is just that plain old baloney, then ask for clarification. Get more details. Ask how you have helped and what kind of difference it has made.
Authenticity is a complex trip up the mountain of success and you need to trust your gut as you explore this vital and yet tough territory to truth in action.
That is what authenticity is really about.