I'm shocked that "Dear Abby" is still around, and that people approach her with real problems. But they do, and here's a letter that really riled me up. I'm going to pretend it was written to me, because it should have been.
DEAR ANYA: My boyfriend, "Scott," and I are writers, although we both have day jobs. During the two years we've been together, we have always supported each other's writing careers.
Things changed after my first novel was published. While initially congratulatory, Scott's behavior was different as the publication date neared. He declined to help my friend throw me a party. When I spotted my book on the shelf of a bookstore for the first time, he chided me to keep my voice down. My novel has now been out for months, but he still hasn't read it. (I gave him one of my free copies.)
When I told Scott how much this hurt me, he agreed to read it and said he was proud of me. But after reading only one chapter, the book was left on the nightstand and he hasn't touched it since.
Scott is a talented writer. He has been published in literary magazines, but hasn't yet published a book. I sympathize with his jealousy and have tried to keep talk of my novel to a minimum. But I'm troubled by Scott's refusal to participate in this exciting period of my life. If he had written a 600-page tome on the digestive habits of the three-toed sloth, and I had to drink a pot of coffee to stay awake through the first chapter, I would still be first in line to buy it. ANYA, what gives? -- FRUSTRATED NOVELIST
I'd like to ask YOU what gives, girl! What the hell are you doing dating someone who won't read your book? It's been out for four months, but you've been dating for two years...he never read a draft? You never had to pick his brain, ask how something sounded, run a plot point by him?
"Scott's" behavior is undermining, immature and pathetic and you better be out fast. What is this doing for your creativity and self-esteem? How are you going to write your next book in this situation? Or, are you not going to write another book because you "sympathize with his jealousy" and want to keep your writing to a minimum, like the acknowledgment of your success? Sure, lots of people doubt their own talent when someone they're close to experiences success before they do, but only wack people let that feeling affect their behavior and the person they love. "Scott" clearly doesn't have the confidence to date another writer, so you should let him go after one of the cashiers at Barnes and Noble. She'll be thrilled to be with a "real writer." (The best ones are never famous in their lifetime). He can tell her what she should really be reading, and she can swoon in his shadow and agree with him when he tells her that her poems are as profound as a role of toilet paper and that she should give up writing so she has more time to type up his manuscripts. And he'll do this, because he's a dick. Ugh, go!
(P.S. Do I know you?)