If you were a baseball player, there are words and phrases you just don't want in the same sentence as your name. Words and phrases like: "federal grand jury", "indicted", "lying to Congress", and finally, "steroids" and "growth hormone".
And yet today, there's a story in Yahoo Sports and a sentence with all the words above plus the words "Roger" and "Clemens".
It goes like this: "A federal grand jury on Thursday indicted seven-time Cy Young Award winner Roger Clemens for allegedly lying to Congress about using steroids and growth hormone."
There's an old joke I've never told out loud because... well, I'm terrible at telling jokes. But I googled it, and lo and behold it's in The Humor Bin:
This the exact same story that Roger wrote for himself with his own actions and mouth.
Now, his nickname won't be as simple as McGreggor's.
I think Roger's is more like "Roger Clemens the lying cheating performance-enhanced greatest right hander in the courtroom that ever lived".
You're all aware that I dislike Roger, and I want you to know that I did this painting over a year ago just waiting for this day because I knew it would come.
And no I'm not a law guy, but I cannot for the life of me figure out why no one has sued a cheating player for taking steroids. It's fraud. When I bought a ticket from MLB, I helped pay Roger Clemens millions of dollars. But he wasn't Roger Clemens, was he?
I bet if MLB (or someone) sued one single player, it would clean up steroids forever.
I found a Lenny Dykstra story where he tells why he did steroids.
Lenny told Lane and Philly.com, "You gotta understand, there were only 28 people who had my job in the whole world." He was referring to the fact that there were only 28 Major League Baseball teams at the time and that each only had one starting center fielder. "And thousands of people wanted those jobs, and every year, there were guys trying to take my job."
"So I needed to do anything I could to protect my job, take care of my family. Do you have any idea how much money was at stake? Do you?"
This steroid issue isn't about enhancing performance. It really is about lying.
Oh yeah, the Cubs were swept in a 4-gamer by the San Diego Padres today.