Dingedheart - yes and no. I initially wrote that thread several months ago. Since then, some things have changed, we have communicated more and resolved quite a bit.
He doesn't treat me that way, no. But I am a secret from the majority of those that they socialize with. His parents and brother know about me, as do some close friends, but I am excluded from alot because of our secret. His reasons are valid, fear of judgement of all 3 of us, him for "cheating" on his sick spouse, her for being too weak minded to put a stop to it and me as a "homewrecker" piece of trash..... We know that none of these things are true but others are not always so understanding and accepting.
So, yes, when I'm excluded, it does extend outside my head.
Doesn't help either when he tells me that quite often he would rather just be with me and his family supports that. They just want him to be happy and he wasn't happy for a very long time until we met.