Hey Jazzmama! I will see if i can help where I can. I will admit, i am not a woman so I do not know how the morning after pill would affect hormones and weight gain :P I will venture a guess that yes I would think they probably would some what.
With that said, insulin is a hormone (an anabolic one at that), is responsible for fat storage and muscle gains, pretty much anything building or storing is from insulin. Perhaps that pill is also tinkering with your insulin or how your body's insulin responds to certain foods.
Things like dairy do create a large insulin spike in people, as would rice. If they are staples in the diet, perhaps removing those would help. Or at the very least, just consuming them in and around your workouts as after the workout is when your insulin sensitivity should be at it's peak.
Another thing that does have my spidey senses tingling is your saying your an overworked mama with kids! That to me may mean you have cortisol issues which do manifest themselves as insulin resistance. Do you drink a lot of coffee too per chance?
My initial suggestions would be to walk everyday. Don't worry too much about the gym and the personal trainer, just take some time for yourself and go for an hour or hour and a half walk each day. Great for weight control, insulin sensitivity, and just overall well being for the mind. Cut out the dairy and rice as much as you can or at least till after your walks. Also maybe try reintroducing IF but give some other time frames a kick at the can. Try the warrior fast (20hrs fast, 4 hr eating window), or decrease it and go for a 16hr fast with 8hr eating window.