Via USA Today, we are brought word of a terrifying beastie that was slithering about the planet 58 million years ago: the titanboa, which we're assuming is Latin for "holy fucking shit, run away from that gigantic snake!" A relative of the modern day anaconda, this massive bastard grew to be the length of a city bus. It's trunk would have reached a person's hips. It ate alligators. Whole. Somebody is probably scripting a crummy SciFi Channel movie about it at this very moment (right after "Wyvern" and "Raptor"!). Being a snake, it thrived in the warm prehistoric climate, so with our current climate change trend, it's entirely plausible that this limbless reptilian nightmare could make a comeback. No word yet from scientists on the possibility of genetically engineering some sort of mega-mongoose to combat this terrifying menace.