My Friend Bill: Ahoy John — very quick question for you, as a man who is well-informed on a wide variety of topics, if you don’t mind.
Me: Fire away!
Bill: An apt response, because the question is:
What sort of ordnance is fired from pie-mounted artillery?
Bill: My feeling is that the answer is “delicious ordnance.”
Me: Well, that does depend on the pie, now, doesn’t it.
Bill: And probably upon the individual tastes of the target.
Me: I was thinking the German for it might be “Meringuenflak”.
Bill: The Germans undoubtedly attempted it when traditional materials for constructing and arming artillery became scarce toward the end of the war.
Me: Who can forget the Marzipan Panzers of April 1945?
Bill: Or the “marzipanzers” as they naturally came to be known.
Me: Yes. At least until the rains came.
Bill: The death toll was terrible.
Though most of it came years later, in the form of complications from diabetes.
Me: Well, and of course the fact that the collapse of the German forces around Berlin was actually a sugar crash.
This is the secret and flavorful history of WWII, which we must witness to the world.
Bill: The truth will no longer be suppressed.