Two blondes in California were sitting on a bench talking ... and one blonde says to the other,
"Which do you think is farther away ... Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ...?"
Did you hear about the great new restaurant on the moon?
The food is excellent, but there's no atmosphere.
Q. What holds the moon up?
Q. How do you know when the moon is going broke?
A. When it's down to its last quarter.
Did you hear NASA wanted to study the effects of the moon on an aging individual, so they decided to resend Armstrong. Unfortunately, they canceled this because they were afraid the first words from the moon in 30 years would be: "Houston? I have fallen, and I can't get up."
Q: How many aerospace engineers does it take to change a light bulb on the moon?
A: None. It doesn't take a rocket scientist, you know.
Q: "Why does the Moon orbit the Earth?" A: "To get to the other side?"
Q. What do you call a clock on the moon?
A. A lunartick.
A teacher asks their students "Which is more useful, the Sun or the Moon?"
After a moment of silence a ten-year old student puts his hand up and answers, "I think it's the Moon because the moon shines at night when you want the light, whereas the Sun shines during the day when you don't need it."
Q. How does a man on a moon get his haircut?
A. Eclipse it.
Did you hear about the bones they found on the moon?
It seems like the cow did not make it. (hey diddle diddle . . .)
Q. What do you get when you take green cheese and divide its circumferenceby its diameter?
A. Moon pi.
Q. How does one astronaut on the moon tell another astronaut that he is sorry?
A. He Apollo-gises.
Q. What was the name of the first satellite to orbit the Earth?
A. The moon.
Q. What's a lunar geologist's favourite Beautiful South song?
A. Don't mare her.
Q. Why did the lunar salesman get fired?
A. Because he couldn't selene thing.
Q. What's the moon goddess' favourite James Bond movie?
A. Diana the Day. (or Moonraker )
Q. What does Michael Jackson have in common with the NASA?
A. It's been 25 years since their first moon walk.
Bill and Ben were walking home from the pub. Bill says to Ben, 'What a beautiful night, look at the moon.'
Ben stops and looks at Bill, 'You are wrong, that's not the moon, that's the sun.' Both started arguing for a while when they come upon a real drunk walking in the other direction, so they stopped him.
'Sir, could you please help settle our argument?
Tell us what that thing is up in the sky that's shining. Is it the moon or the sun?' The drunk looked at the sky and then looked at them, and said,
'Sorry, I don't live around here.'
Q. What do moon peolple do when they get married?
A. They go off on their honeyearth!
After the Americans went to the Moon, the Soviets announced that they would be sending a man to the Sun.
The engineers objected. "If you send a man to the Sun, he will burn up!"
"What do you think I am, stupid?" he replied. "We'll send him at night!"