First off : I'm with you buddy, isolation is a bitch and those concerned know it ! You're not alone ! If coping in your case involves fantasies, what is the issue of that ? I strongly suggest not losing touch with reality, but in case of balance and it helps - do it. Remember, it's just a passage to something better. The road might be long, but the satisfaction and knowledge that follows even longer lasting. You're planting a seed that first needs sufficient conditions in order to come out. Give the seed what it needs, and after a while it become strong enough to survive on its own. But first give it what it needs. Without a root, it can't grow. And every individual has a different prescription of how to grow.
I strongly suggest not to self diagnose because for finding the incorrect conclusions, you might assume false theories and wind up in fatal confusion. Besides, if ever self medicated as a consequence, you might even worsen symptoms.
Ask a pro. Other thing, is there a reason for claiming yourself intelligent yet self diagnosing with severe disorders ? I do not consider myself smart but I'm surprised of the missing awareness of the risk of doing that.
And why your lack of modesty ? Personally, I admire those who see how relative IQ is on different domains. Being self proclaimed smart, I didn't expect that from your behalf.
If any of this came over as offensive, disrespectful, selfish or blameworthy of any kind, I'm aware of my possibly unreasonable social behaviour and apology for the inconvenience. Having frequent waves of a certain low self esteem myself, I fully understand and respect ones insecurities.
Certified artist :: singer
22 year old male