According to the United States Census Bureau today’s generation of school-age children spend the majority of their waking hours in the care of someone other than their parents. Do you know who’s on your team this year? Given the influence that teachers, coaches, mentors and extended family members have on a child’s development, the necessity for building a relationship with this group of people has never been greater. And creating a team of focused and motivated individuals who will continually support the ongoing growth of your child requires a new set of parenting skills.
Want to get starting building a team to help your child succeed this school year? Here are 5 steps to building your support team:
- Create a roster. Who will impact your child’s life this year? Begin by creating a list of the adults who will connect with your child during the first month of school. Teachers, school administrators, coaches, mentors and extended family members are common additions to most team rosters.
- Position the players. With a completed roster in place, identify when and where your child will see these critical people. Teachers and school personnel typically fall within a specified seven hour time block on a regular Monday through Friday schedule. However, the afterschool hours are equally important. Identifying who will supervise your child beyond the conclusion of the school day creates an accurate picture of your child’s life and the role that each adult will play this year.
- Connect. The beginning of a school year marks the start to many new and inspiring relationships. During the first few weeks of school take two minutes to communicate with each person on your roster. Send a written note, email message or share a quick conversation in person. The message to convey is short yet sincere, “Hi, I just wanted you to know how excited I am to have you in my child’s life this year.” This quick introduction sends a powerful message to everyone on your team about the importance of their role in your child’s life.
- Check-in. Don’t wait until a problem arises to initiate a conversation. Every 2-3 weeks check in with each of the people on your roster. Start the conversation with, “How are you?” and then let the discussion flow from there. Beginning with an open-ended question allows the conversation about your child to evolve naturally. Leading questions like, “How was her behavior today?” or “Were there any problems?” bring immediate focus to a potentially negative set of comments that result in creating greater distance between parents and key adults in their child’s life. The opportunity to share positive comments or questions can be lost amidst the negativity.
- Celebrate. Reaching milestones and achieving goals is cause for celebration. Placing a quick call to your child’s teacher after the conclusion of a long term project or class play shows acknowledgement and appreciation—two characteristics of supportive teams. The more frequently team members celebrate together the stronger the relationship grows. As a teacher and a mom, Dee Moran knows the importance of celebrating achievement. “Our six-year-old likes being recognized for his achievements. The simplest words of praise and acknowledgment leave him proud for days. Julie, our thirteen-year-old, typically opts for a more subtle approach to celebration, preferring to spend a night out with friends at the movies after bringing a successful semester to a close. Celebrating achievements both small and large keeps everyone moving forward,” she says.
Bringing the valued members of your team together both, at home and in the community, allows your vision for your child's success to become a reality, and celebrating inspires motivation for continued achievement!