Dear Ann Landers: I just read E.F.`s solution to the ``buy me . . . `` syndrome that children sometimes fall into when shopping. I would like to offer a solution that worked for me.
We have three boys, 6, 8 and 10. For the last three years, we have given them a weekly allowance. Fifty percent is for spending, 40 percent for saving, and 10 percent to be given to the church. We pay them extra for work they do beyond their regular chores. This is money they can spend on whatever they want.
We have laid down a rule: If they want something that is allowable but we feel unnecessary, they have to buy it with their own money.
Now, instead of demanding things, they look for the item they want, check the price to see if they think it`s worth it, and decide if they have enough money to buy it. Then they have to make up their minds whether they really want it or if they`d rather save the money for something else.
When they decided that they wanted a Nintendo, they pooled their money for months until they had enough to buy it. They know that if they want games, they must spend their own money because I won`t buy them luxuries.
This system has not only eliminated many demands but has turned our children into thoughtful consumers-something that will serve them well all their lives.
It`s Working in California
Dear California: What lucky kids to have been born into your family! Your plan sounds terrific. I heartily recommend it.
Read on for another example of wise parental strategy:
Dear Ann Landers: Recently I read in your column about the mother who said that when she and her children go shopping they decide if it`s a
``looking day`` or a ``buying day.`` I did the same when my youngsters were growing up and it worked wonders.
I have four sons. Every Saturday I gave them each an allowance. I taped a list of chores to the refrigerator. All were assigned. At the end of the week, I paid the children in quarters. Then we`d check the list. For each chore that wasn`t done, they`d have to give me back a quarter. I never scolded them. I just took their quarters. Needless to say, after a while I wasn`t getting many quarters.
I started this system when each child turned 2. They received $1 a week. The 2-year-old had four chores: picking up toys, saying ``please,`` saying
``thank you`` and saying nightly prayers. If he forgot just once during the week, it cost him one quarter.
Each child had his own log book. At the end the year, we`d sit down together and check the books. The one who had paid me the fewest quarters would receive a $1 raise. If anyone had outside activities or spent the night with a friend, he had to pay his brother a quarter to do his chores for him.
What fun we had! At the same time it helped make them responsible adults. Our youngest son is 22 now, and we are extremely proud of all our children. If you`d like to print this letter, feel free, but hold the name. Just sign me
Mrs. J. from Pennsylvania
Dear Mrs. J.: Cheers from Chicago on an excellent blueprint for teaching kids how to be responsible adults. My hat is off to you.