'Orientation' seems to be the politically correct term. I still hear people refer to homosexuality as a "sexual preference." Many of them don't say it in a negative way. Does it irritate you when someone uses 'preference' over 'orientation'?
Sexual Orientation, or Sexual Preference?
|by Anonymous||reply 44||05/13/2013|
I never thought about it before but when someone on here complained about it the other day it makes sense.
Preference implies something you chose. Orientation is an exact scientific term, like that's how you are.
I don't think it necessarily means anything but the one that gets me is "alternative lifestyle". That clearly is disrespectful.
|by Anonymous||reply 1||05/11/2013|
Neither a lifestyle nor a preference. This discussion feel s 25 years out of date.
|by Anonymous||reply 2||05/11/2013|
It's "sexual identity."
|by Anonymous||reply 3||05/11/2013|
I think sexual identity says it best. It covers all the bases and it's not offensive at all.
|by Anonymous||reply 4||05/11/2013|
"Sexual identity" is NOT a good term. It sounds like you're talking about whether you think you're male or female, as in transgender. Sexual orientation is about what you're ATTRACTED to, i.e. heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||05/11/2013|
OP, get it right and then shut up about what "people" use:
My sexual orientation is gay.
My sexual preference is fucking hunky guys in the ass.
|by Anonymous||reply 6||05/11/2013|
I think they're related concepts that often get muddled/confused.
A gay man might say:
My gender identity is male.
My sexual preference is sex with men.
My sexual orientation is gay.
So gender identity + sexual preference = sexual orientation.
|by Anonymous||reply 7||05/11/2013|
Well, you make a point on the trans issue.
What about a woman who occasionally has sex with a woman, but could do without it with no problem. Never mind. I know nobody gives a shit.
|by Anonymous||reply 8||05/11/2013|
I am irritated when anyone cares enough about my life that they have to label me or have an opinion about whom I choose to love and have an intimate personal relationship with.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||05/11/2013|
When non gay people say "sexual preference" its code for "I dont approve of what you are doing"
It's not an accident. This intentional use of the word "preference" has been a clever talking point from religious freaks and right wing nuts for the past 20 years.
It's a way of invalidating how you were born and putting it a category of choice. Once its a choice, you can tell people they are making bad choices. If on the other hand you were born that way, then god dose not make mistakes. Get it?
So yes, it pisses me off because it is not an accident. Even if I feel the person using it is truly ignorant about it, still shows who they are listening to.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||05/11/2013|
R10 nailed it.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||05/11/2013|
A bisexual person might have a preference for either male or female. There is no "preference" for a gay person.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||05/11/2013|
R8 It's called bisexual. Bisexuality doesn't mean exactly 50/50 attraction to men and women. You can be more attracted to one gender and less to another.
|by Anonymous||reply 13||05/11/2013|
"Sexual Preference" is homophobic.
Plain and simple. If I called your skin color your "Racial Preference".....
File this under the little ways the Jesus Freaks try and insert self hate into the gay community.
|by Anonymous||reply 14||05/11/2013|
Sexual Orientation = gay male (sex with other males)
Sexual preference = ginger guys.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||05/11/2013|
It was a common term when I was growing up. People also often compares being gay to preferring one kind of ice cream over another - no big deal, just what you like.
I used the term offhand on Datalounge once and got ripped to shreds. Some people just need something to get incensed about.
|by Anonymous||reply 16||05/11/2013|
R10 is correct. My sexual preference or preferences are none of your business. My status -- who I am -- can be if I choose to share it with you.
Funny that 20+ years ago, when you identified yourself as gay, many well-meaning straights would think it was an open door for them to ask all sorts of personal questions -- what do you do, how do you do it, why do you do it.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||05/11/2013|
What's the difference? I don't care if it's a preference or an orientation, people have a right to be treated equally and with respect. Period.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||05/11/2013|
'Sexual preference' is a right-wing code term. 'Sexual orientation' is at least neutral.
End of thread.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||05/11/2013|
Sexual preference is entirely correct when people fuck both genders willy nilly.
|by Anonymous||reply 20||05/11/2013|
Yes r17. They fixate on "who's the woman". I think they even use or are very aware of tops and bottoms as descrptors now, not exactly difficult to figure out.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||05/11/2013|
Apple pie is a preference.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||05/11/2013|
R21, true! And the weirdest thing is that people who ask those kind of questions do not realize how rude they're being.
R18, you are smart enough to participate in this thread.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||05/11/2013|
OP: yes, it pisses me off. Everyone here has nailed it: it is an orientation.
What pisses me off even more, though, is when sites like Towleroad and other gay blogs still use the term 'sexual preference'. Makes me see red. A great swash of fire engine red.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||05/11/2013|
I've stopped giving a shit what people say or think.
Legal equality is goal #1. After that, meh... idiots will still be idiots. Nothing you say or do will change that.
|by Anonymous||reply 25||05/11/2013|
People are not born religious, they have a religious preference.
I prefer the religious preference of Episcopalians to that of the religious preference of Evangelicals.
|by Anonymous||reply 26||05/11/2013|
Preference is preferring french fries to baked potatoes. When you get older the preference may change. Why not your preference for homosexuality?
|by Anonymous||reply 27||05/11/2013|
It's the key to the whole bisexuality question. Bisexuality is unquestionably a scientifically observable orientation. It has never been observed as a "preference."
|by Anonymous||reply 29||05/11/2013|
R28 doesn't not get the illustration.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||05/11/2013|
Really, R27.... are you so idiotic that you do not know there is a yet undiscovered gene that determines if you are a "baked" or "Fried" person? It has nothing to do with learned behavior, cultural pressures, or PREFERENCE. It is out of our control. And since this is Datalounge, where being a French Fry eater, especially a FAST FOOD French Fry eater, is far worse than being gay would be for a member of Westboro Baptist Church, it is due to genetics and can not be helped.
Actually the genetic vs choice crap depresses me. It shows how profound the homophobia is in this board. So what if it is a choice? It should be considered a totally valid choice and equal to any other choice about sexual issues. I am from the 70's where we used the term preference.... because I attended LOTS of parties and saw fluidity in action kids. When you get intense on the "born this way" you are saying "What I am is wrong, but I was born this way." That saddens me. I think you are absorbing and giving out the wrong message. I am old and I am now thinking I will exit this life with the world almost as fucked up on the issue of sexuality as it was when I came into it...... the politically correct cul de sac moves to a different place in the road and keeps the world from making any real progress down the main highway.
|by Anonymous||reply 31||05/11/2013|
Sexual Orientation = gay guys
Sexual Preference = lesbians
|by Anonymous||reply 32||05/11/2013|
I wouldn't tell anyone that r23. Well except my fellow gays and strangers on the internet lol.
It's just so tacky, like that thread about nelly tops. TMI. We don't need to know. That is giving too much of yourself away if you broadcast it to the world, just nasty.
|by Anonymous||reply 33||05/11/2013|
Think of all the "gay" guys who dig pussy, though.
|by Anonymous||reply 34||05/11/2013|
My signature should have been "Sexuality is as individual as a fingerprint.... what you are is what is RIGHT". It got cut off. But I got more words in the signature line than I would have speaking to a group of 3 or more of you before getting cut off.....
|by Anonymous||reply 35||05/11/2013|
The correct term--not "politically correct" but rather simply correct--is sexual orientation--or how you are naturally wired.
Sexual preference is bigoted and homophobic. Vanilla ice cream over chocolate is a preference.
Sexual identity is being confused about your gender, or perhaps more aptly described as being born a male in a female body or vice versa.
|by Anonymous||reply 36||05/11/2013|
>>>>> "The correct term--not "politically correct" but rather simply correct--is sexual orientation--or how you are naturally wired"
No, it is politically correct, not necessarily correct. There remains no proof that any genetic cause exists. Saying it over and over is no substitute for scientific proof.
I am trained in human sexuality and feel homosexuality is a redundancy to heterosexuality, as sexual activity between humans is above all social with a reproductive side effect. Homosexuality exists within most people just like heterosexuality.... something causes it to be expressed as the dominant sexual attraction just as left handedness is expressed in a similar percentage of the population rather than the more common right-handedness. Being left handed was once actively discouraged, repressed and viewed as evil by the religious as well. Now we would see the act of a nun hitting the hand of a lefty and forcing them to use the right to be ignorant and barbaric. Just a generation ago, kids.....
Sex and sexual activity aids survival of those already born, it encourages cooperation and bonding in a tribe. It also leads to more humans, but even when the sexual activity is not of the type that leads to impregnation, it is still valuable to the species, it is intensely and intimately social.
|by Anonymous||reply 37||05/11/2013|
for gay guys it's orientation, for bi it's preference
|by Anonymous||reply 38||05/11/2013|
Right wing/religious winguts are also instructed to use the word "homosexual" rather than "gay" or "same-sex". The latter sound too harmless. The former paints a mental picture of two people of the same gender having sex
|by Anonymous||reply 39||05/11/2013|
Tomato, tomato, potato, potato....
|by Anonymous||reply 40||05/11/2013|
The currently acceptable term is "into dudes."
|by Anonymous||reply 41||05/11/2013|
[quote]When non gay people say "sexual preference" [bold]its code[/bold] for "I dont approve of what you are doing"
R10 is right on target.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||05/12/2013|
R37 is right, and I'm glad to see that after me being the only idiot repeating that over and over for years here, it has insinuated itself into somebody else's brain.
|by Anonymous||reply 43||05/13/2013|
[quote]I am trained in human sexuality
Translation: I'm a whore, darling.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||05/13/2013|