(1)You know what this blog needs? More pictures of my kids. Because everyone LOOOOOOVES looking at pictures of other people's children, oh yes they do...
But wait. First, a word about "looooooooooves".
(2)Here's the deal, y'all. If you wanna say the "o" sound a lot in your head, you can write the letter "o" eight thousand times. But...but...BUT: if you write the word "loveeeeeeeeeeees", I will cry the tears of a thousand orphaned goats. Because do you know what that word says? That word, according to the rules of phonics (hooked on phonics worked for me!), says "loveys." Or perhaps "lovies". But it is not, is not, is not the same as "looooooooooooooooves."
Same rule applies to the word "awesome".
Aaaaaaaaaaaawesome = good
Awesooooooooooome = also fine
Awesomeeeeeeeeeeee = unacceptable. Tears. Orphaned goats.
Okay, where was I? Oh yes! Photos of my adorable children!
(3)So yesterday I decided I would try and get a photo of all 5 of them at the same time "without them noticing" (Please, moms of many, stop with the hysterical laughter). Let's see how it turned out, shall we?
Okay, great. I see 4 kids. Wait. Where's the baby?
Aha! There she is. I can just move her all stealth-like over to....
Oops! Large child has left the group. Fine I'll go ahead and...
What the...? Now the boy is over here, too? Okay. No prob. I'll just scootch back...
Dagnabit! Where's the big one that was in the tree???
Fine. I give up.
Hey, did you see the Virtual 5K Roundup I promised Cari would post back on...um...whatever day that was? See it, then come back. Did you see us in the lower right corner of the montage? Aren't you so imprssed
Okay, so here's how everything went south and how 4 bloggers and 1 non-blogger all ended up NotRunning the 5K together but instead had a party that involved no running...
(begin transcript of real coversation between dweej and her hubby)
D: The CE virtual 5K! That I told you about! We're doing it together!
T: What???? You're gonna dump 17 kids on us and then leave for possibly hours on end????
D: DUMP 17 kids on you? You mean YOUR OWN CHILDREN???
T: Don't play coy with me woman.
D: So the girls just have to slave away and the boys can do whatever they want? I see how it is.
T: Um. I'm sorry. Who did all the actual cooking?
T: And who has the (insert some fancy name for 'boobs' that isn't the word 'boobs' so that you'll think we don't use that word) for the babies?
T: But I promise! I'll make it fun! I'll even take the photos. Pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaaasee don't abandon us....
D: Fine. But you better make it good, son! You. Better.
(5)So instead of us crossing the finish line (toilet paper), the finish line (toilet paper) crossed us. But luckily the men had been very generous with the beer servin' up until that point, so we weren't really as annoyed with them and their refusal-to-'babysit' as we should have been. What can I say? I'm predictable.
(7)In conclusion: Cute baby waiting for a phone call to wash your eyeballs of the scandalous scando that you were just forced to witness...