Q: Why is it that when a man relentlessly pursues a girl it's cute or romantic, but when a girl does the same it's viewed as pathetic or even slutty? It seems nearly impossible to woo a man who is uninterested, yet a girl who is uninterested needs only to be worn down with romantic gestures and time.
This is something I've been wondering about for literally years.
You're right, it's a double standard, and it's a dangerous one. If somebody, of either gender, keeps after someone else even if they're categorically not interested, it's not cute and romantic nor pathetic and slutty: it's creepy. Stalking behavior is stalking behavior, period, and, if somebody won't leave you alone when you tell them no, it's time to get the law involved.
As to why the double standard exists in the first place...all I can offer are guesses. My personal opinion is that most people get their cues about romance not from asking questions of actual people but from pop culture. And what do you see in pop culture? Charlie Sheen being constantly followed by a hot girl who is seemingly obsessed with him, and this is supposed to be hilarious. Jughead avoiding the attentions of Big Ethel. Romantic "comedies" about a guy who won't leave a woman alone no matter what.
At the same time, though, pop culture just reflects what we want to see. It follows the money. So the problem is as much us, clinging to outdated ideas of the woman always being demure and the man always being aggressive.
You know, because that worked out SO well.
Let's chat about this double standard--do you think it's totally unfair, or maybe there's something to it?
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