November is National Adoption Month, a time to raise awareness about the 6,400 children in New York state waiting for a “forever family” and to thank and celebrate adoptive families. These children urgently need to move from temporary foster homes into permanent, loving, forever families.
Adoption is important to me professionally and personally, as I am the mother of two adopted children now in their 20s. My personal understanding of the complexities of adoption, coupled with the challenges infertile couples, singles, and gay and lesbian hopeful parents face, and the lifelong implications for children, compelled me to work in the adoption field. At Hillside Family of Agencies we are passionate about permanency. It is deeply fulfilling to bring a child into a family that will help him or her heal and feel forever loved, to help families grow through adoption and to keep children safe, secure and empowered with a sense of belonging.
We are deeply moved by the number of children who tell us they want someone to love them, kiss them goodnight, tuck them into bed, and keep them safe forever. They often ask us, “Did you find me a family yet?” For each child whom we help to find a forever family, we are reminded of the great work we do, giving children a real chance to reach their full potential.
We connect families who want to adopt with waiting children in the child welfare system, newborns, and children from abroad, helping to fulfill the dreams of those who so very much want to be parents. When children are connected with families willing to make a lifelong commitment, they learn to feel safe and secure and develop positive attachments, relationships and an overall healthy well-being. Long-term outcomes are significantly more positive for youth who are adopted than for those who “age out” of the system, languish in foster care or orphanages around the world, or remain in an unstable, detached or neglectful home.
The emotions I felt when adopting both of my children are indescribable. I imagine most parents feel the same the first time they see their child. My son and daughter’s birth mothers gave me the most generous gift of all — these two sweet, beautiful babies made me a mom. They also gave me the gift of a calling, inspiring me to work in the adoption field, giving other children, like my own, an opportunity to finally feel true everlasting love.
Let us recommit to ensuring every child is given the sustaining love of family, the assurance of a permanent home and the supportive upbringing all children deserve.
Maynard is director of Adoption Services at Hillside Children’s Center.