Skip to comments.Will you get these 20 jokes meant for really brainy people?
Posted on 03/12/2014 9:46:13 AM PDT by The Looking Spoon
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I notice that everyone here has an answer for the beer joke. Is it cocktail hour yet?
You know about the student who answered the test question about how to measure the height of a tall building using a barometer, right?
1. Go to the top of the building.
2. Tie a rope to the barometer.
3. Lower it off the side of the building to the ground.
4. Measure the rope.
Really? Mine is Harvard Law School.
Good. Elegant and to the point.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a mountain climber?
You can’t. A mountain climber is a scalar.
A dyslexic ran into a bra ...
Oct 32 = Dec 25 means OCTAL 32 (base 8) is equal to DECIMAL 25 (Base 10)
(3 x 8) + 2 = (2 x 10) + 5
Hold up two fingers. Which Roman numeral does it look like?
Pavlov is known for his experiments where he would ring a bell and feed a dog, after a while the dog learned that the bell meant they would be fed and start to salivate even when no food was present, this has become know as Pavlov’s response. or a Pavlovian response. The joke is a play on his experiment where they are implying he is having a Pavlovian response to feed the dog every time a bell rings.
A plumber would say Yoonyunized, as in being in a union. A chemist would say un-eye-oh-nized, as in not ionized.
Chomsky claims that the reason communism hasnt been successful is because no one has done it right yet.
That's how I took it.
Number 8 is a logical truth statement: the baby can only be a boy or a girl.
How very closed minded of you. ;)
Thanks for these ... I sent them to my most intellectual friends (yup, both of them). Bumping for later review of the comments :-)
...and those who don't understand that this is a tertiary joke.
I was pseudo-intellectual enough to get most and guess the rest.
Heizenberg is known for the uncertainty principal, which is a quantum mechanical concept that relates to momentum and position... and states that the more certain you are to know ONE of these variable, the less certain you are to know the other hence his line “how can we know this is funny or not” in the joke.
Godel is known for the “Incompleteness Theorem”
For a given (non-trivial) formal system, there will be statements that are true in that system, but which cannot be proved to be true inside the system.
Hence since he is inside the Joke he cannot prove its funny or not because he’s INSIDE THE SYSTEM.
Chomsky is know for the Chomsky hierarchy (occasionally referred to as ChomskySchützenberger hierarchy) is a containment hierarchy of classes of formal grammars. So he’s arguing its funny you are just telling it wrong, I am interpreting as a play on bad grammar.
I will yeild to others on the chomsky, but that’s what I read it as.
Already got it Ace. Thanks though! And it was the easiest one. Coffee brewing now!
The two fingers were a “V,” Roman numeral for 5.
Yes, I got all but about 5, and may get those if I think about them. That doesn’t mean they’re all funny, but some are. Thanks for posting.
To the plumber, the word reads “yoonyunized.” To the chemist, it’s “un-eye-un-ized.”
See post 108
Thanks though! Can;t believe I got the others, and missed that one,,, the very st!
We are running the programmer joke by those who write our specs. We want to know what a software tester would do with those instructions.
I’m a BA. That’s one of the reasons I thought it was so funny. I also wear SA and TA hats from time to time, btw, so that one really did speak to the pitfalls of what I do.
Loved that one a few years ago but now it seems a little tired. Maybe because I'm tired.
Nobodys smarter than Yogi Berra!
That reminds me of an ad for nearby amusement park called Carowinds. The slogan was: “Nothing’s more fun!” So I saved the $50 admission fee and had more fun at home.
Same with turning iron into gold.
One atom says to another, “I think I lost an electron...”
The other one says, “Are you positive?”
“Descartes responds I think not and vanishes into thin air.”
Now that’s a riot.
Noah observes that the rain had stopped, and the Ark was on dry land.
So, he opens the gates and tells all the animals to go forth and multiply.
As he is watching the procession, a couple of snakes go up to Noah and say to him “We’re adders. How can we multiply?”
Noah thinks about this for a moment, and gets an idea.
He goes back into the Ark to get his tools and proceeds to cut down a tree, and builds a table using the branches.
Then, he sets the snakes on the table and says to them...
“There. Even adders can multiply on a log table.”
I should have looked ahead to see where that adder joke was going.
“Godel is known for the Incompleteness Theorem. For a given (non-trivial) formal system, there will be statements that are true in that system, but which cannot be proved to be true inside the system.”
Then the proposition that that there is no God could never be proved.
The first two logicians couldn’t answer the bartenders question until the third one indicated yes. Do ALL OF YOU want a beer?
If either of the first two had answered no, then either the second or the third would have answered no, which is why the third could declare YES. Had either of the first two NOT wanted a beer, the answer to the bartender’s question would be no.
My favorites are 4 and 12.
All but #13, so I gues I’m super brainy for not wasting brain cells on Chomsky!
I actually thought 19 was funny.
Hahahahahahaha! Threads like this are why I have stayed on FR all these years...:)
Thanx. I didn’t know the other two guys.
My son in college was taking logic. It didn’t make any sense to me - just a bunch of symbols and stuff - could have been hieroglyphics for all I could tell.
His first logics class - straight A’s!
I had a good friend of mine who was a philosophy major, and a guy in his class who was a bit of a burnout (too much weed, acid or something) handed in a one page document for his project for the class, which was expected to be 5000 words or something like that.
On the single page, there was a single line that said “Because I am simply writing this one line, it proves that I understand the material.”
My friend said given the course (It was something like Existential Humanistic Psychology or something weird like that, I can’t remember) it was a brilliant response, and showed exactly that he understood.
The guy got an “F” and failed the course...
Ah! Thank you...
Roman numeral for 5 = V
I didn’t get 3, 4 and 12.
Good thing its Oct 31... ;-P
Now I know this one, did I include this on my list of “do not understand”s?
A software tester would pass the scenario based on the business requirement. Now a quality assurance professional would realize the business requirement was wrong and raise an issue.
(3 x 8) = 24
24 + 2 = 26
(2 x 10) = 20
20 + 5 = 25
Hate to break it to you, but your math is wrong.
I took a philosophy class in high school and we were given an essay test with about 10 questions. Tuff test. One brainy guy finished the test, then wrote one sentence or one word answers to each of the questions - for fun (!!). The only one I can remember was:
“How does Kant’s Critique of Pure Reason fit into his philosophical system?”
So Heisenberg was racing through town in his hot little BMW.
A cop pulls him over. “Sir,” he says, “do you have any idea how fast you were going?”
“No,” says Heisenberg, “but I know where I am”.
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