From: Glossed Over
Re: Your progress with the English language
Last month, we discussed your penchant for making up words (which is completely unnecessary, as you’re inventing constructions when words that mean the exact same thing already exist). Now that you’ve had an issue to consider our suggestions, we wanted to follow up on your progress using commonly accepted American English terms.
Grey’s Anatomy’s Katherine Heigl spills her fashion secrets
We understand there was absolutely no way to avoid that double apostrophe. Obviously, there were serious considerations preventing you from saying something less awkward like, oh, “Katherine Heigl of Grey’s Anatomy,” and thereby sidestepping that quandary. We can’t think of what those might be, but we’re sure you had your reasons.
Unfortunately, our dismay didn’t end there. Below, in alphabetical order, is the list of dubious words sprinkled throughout the January issue.
partyworthy (We freely admit to nitpicking here. “Party-worthy” would be our preference.)
We’d especially like to discuss the final entry on the list. What is this word and what could it possibly mean? How many editors looked at this and decided it was perfectly comprehensible to the average person who doesn’t actually work at Lucky? Let’s take a look at the context:
We keep this in the beauty department at all times for last-minute volumizing: Flip your hair over, spritz a few times, and zhoozh with your fingers.
That doesn’t exactly clarify this strange word apparently invented in the heat of a hair-volume emergency. Is zhoozhing like scrunching? Is it distributing the product through your hair? What else could you do with your fingers in this instance?
We’re stumped. Perhaps the staff should consider including a Lucky-specific glossary in each issue. Or perhaps it would be easier if we simply give up trying to read the small amount of text in each issue. From now on, we’ll just stick to the pictures.