Sometimes a seasoned reporter must put his personal interests aside and write a distasteful story. What appears below came my way weeks ago and I refused to comment on it. Still, the public has a right to know, so here we go.
There’s a major cat fight in New Zealand, where environmentalists have barred their claws in an effort save native birds. A guy named Garth Morgan is calling on his countrymen to make their current cat their last in order to save the nation’s unique bird species.
His website, Cats To Go, shows a tiny kitten with red devil’s horns. The opening line: “That little ball of fluff you own is a natural born killer.”
Years ago, I had a cat named Max, who ate my parakeet, Peep, and swallowed my goldfish, Carp. Then there was Butch, who daily arranged a number of mice, rats, moles, baby robins, and even dirty diapers from my neighbors patio on my back step. Talk about litter!
Morgan agrees his plan is not purrfect, but he wants catlovers to neuter their pets and not replace them when they die. He also suggests that local governments make cat registration mandatory.
But this campaign is not sitting well in a country with the highest cat ownership rates in the world. Some 47 percent of the people there have at least one cat, and these feline fanciers are angry. (Note: In the U.S., 33 percent of households own at least one cat.)
Morgan notes the country’s native birds had no predators and flourished for centuries. Some species, like the kiwi, became flightless. But the arrival of mankind and its introduction of predators like cats, dogs, and rodents has wiped out some native bird species altogether and endangered many others.
“Imagine a country teeming with native wildlife, penguins on the beach, kiwis roaming about in your garden,” Morgan writes on his website. “Imagine hearing birdsong in our cities.”
But even on Morgan’s website, 70 percent of the population voted against making their current cat their last.
Science remains unclear on the issue. Some argue that cats may actually help native birds by reducing the population of rodents, which sometimes feed on bird eggs. Such a catastrophe!
Scientist David Winter says cats are indeed a problem in New Zealand, having contributed to the extinction of at least half a dozen bird species. Writing on his blog “The Atavism,” Winter said Morgan seemed to be pretty purrsnickety with his campaign that is merely a conversation starter.
By the way, did you hear about the cat that swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens. Had enough? One more please. What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has the paws before the claws and the other has the clause before the pause.
The author is the former editor of this newspaper. His short stories (which are better than the above column) appear in the Rainy Day Writers three books--”SOLD!,” “The Southgate Parkway Murders,” and “Cambridge at Christmastime.”