Not a story, but more a question regarding door-holding etiquette and who owes what. I used to have this disagreement with an old boyfriend on a fairly regular basis, and was wondering if the admin and commenters could weigh in, out of curiosity for what the “right” answer is. My ex found it unacceptably rude if, after someone held a door open for him, they didn’t respond to his “Thank you” with “You’re welcome.” I was of the opinion that having already done you one favour by holding the door, the stranger is in the clear, so to speak, and owes you nothing. Especially if they respond in another way, like smiling or nodding or something. It seemed very demanding to me to insist that someone who has already do e something nice for you must then go through an extra little song and dance to keep their politeness from being rude. But my ex would grumble and huff about it later and insist that thanks deserve recognition, and by not responding “correctly” the door-holder was being rude and disrespectful. Who was in the right? 0726-14
If one goes through life expecting to be rewarded for good manners, I think the likelihood of chronic disappointment and disillusionment is highly probable. We should behave in a kind, civil manner because it edifies the individual, it feels good, and there is the intrinsic satisfaction of doing something that contributes to the overall good. Your ex has a fairly shallow and superficial reason for why he acts politely in society…when people respond the way he believes they should, he gets an immediate “reward” and if they do not, he grouses about it meaning he is, at least, ungracious.