You are pushing the kart down the grocery store aisle, when your child throws a temper tantrum. This moment is inevitable for all parents, because all children experience temper tantrums. They may happen for different reasons and at different ages, but they are a normal part of growing up. There are no magic words to make tantrums disappear. Fortunately, however, you can respond in ways that can help.
A tantrum is a sudden, intense display of uncontrolled anger or frustration. Screaming, kicking, falling on the ground, or other forceful body motions are typical. Tantrums are most common in children ages 15 months to 4 years old.
Some think that a crying infant is having a tantrum, but this isn’t true. Infants express their needs by crying because it’s their only way of communicating that they need your care. Infants who are comforted and have their needs met quickly develop a sense of security. This leads to less crying in the future.
Toddlers are the kings and queens of tantrums. Toddlers are just learning how to talk, express their feelings, and problem-solve. Because their skills aren’t very good yet, their frustrations sometimes erupt in a tantrum. Tantrums are most likely to happen when toddlers are hungry, tired, frustrated, or overexcited.
Preschoolers and Tantrums
Preschoolers are less likely than toddlers to have temper tantrums, since most have developed better coping and communication skills. But they can still get upset and lose control. Preschoolers need adults to teach them to recognize and express their emotions, needs, and wants in more skillful ways.
Read More About It!
For more information, see these extension publications:
Understanding Children: Temper Tantrums
Understanding Children: Disciplining Your Preschooler
Ages and Stages: 2-year-olds
Authors: Alicia Tieskoetter and Diana L. Baltimore, Department of Human Development and Family Studies, Iowa State University