What do moms, the auspicious date of 11/11/11 and Nigel Tufnel from Spinal Tap have in common? Just one thing. A tool to measure just how much prodding is required to get kids to behave themselves. It’s called the Mommyland Nagging Spectrum. And as you probably guessed — it goes to eleven.
Anyone who would ask why a mom’s nag meter would need to go that high obviously doesn’t have kids. Let me give you five examples of things I have needed to remind my children to do that over time. Things I never expected to say at all, let alone repeatedly.
Number 1: We do not wipe ourselves with the shower curtain. We ask for more toilet paper.
Number 2: It’s 40 degrees and raining outside. You might want to consider wearing pants.
Number 3: How do you only have one shoe? When we got in the car, you had two. Where is your other shoe and why is the window open?
Number 4: Are you allowed to touch mommy’s iPhone? No, you are not. SO WHY IS IT WET?
Number 5: You should probably not wear the same pair of socks five days in a row. I can smell them from here, that’s how I know they’re the same socks. Please change them.
Last summer I partnered with my friend Amy, the genius behind the blog Pregnant Chicken, and we created the spectrum for all the mommies over at Rants from Mommyland (my home turf). You can read more about how it commemorates 11/11/11 and Nigel Tufnel day right here.