It is normal to want love and approval from your mother. Everybody does. If you get it when you are young, you internalize those feelings and need less validation when you grow up.
But if you don’t get it, you tend to replay her harsh, critical words in your head: Your hair looks awful. You shouldn’t wear jeans. Did you gain weight?
And you internalize that nagging, hectoring voice, so it becomes your own criticism of yourself.