The core principle of this Law of Attraction work revolves around how we feel – our emotions. Most people try to squash or ignore their negative emotions. They think that negative emotions are something “bad”. But our emotions are simply a feedback system, that lets us know in any given moment if what we’re thinking about ourselves or the world is leading us closer to what we want or pushing us further away. And if what we’re thinking is pushing us further away, we’ll experience negative emotions.
I thought I’d create a little video series, where I delve into a different negative emotion each week and try to explain what kinds of beliefs may be causing those emotions and what messages those emotions may hold for you.
Today, I’d like to start with Envy and Jealousy.
What exactly is the difference between envy and jealousy? Aren’t they pretty much the same? Well, no. Envy and jealousy are both triggered by the same stimuli – by seeing someone else who has something that you want. But the core beliefs that cause each of these emotions are vastly different. So, in order to treat those beliefs and release them, it’s best to separate envy from jealousy.
Jealousy arises when you see someone else with something that you want, and think that because they have it, your chances of getting the same thing have diminished. There’s only one pie and everyone that takes a piece has lessened your chances of also getting a piece.
Jealousy is generally tied to two core beliefs.
- Scarcity – that there’s a finite amount of resources. This is a false belief. Everything is just energy and energy simply expands. The Universe isn’t going to run out of resources to get you what you really want.
- Control – you’ve decided that what you really want has to come to you in a specific way.
Let me give you an example: You have a car dealership and you’ve set an intention to get rich. You think that in order to get rich, you’re going to have to sell a lot of cars. The more cars you sell, the more money you’ll make. There’s a rival car dealership right across the road from you and every time you see them selling a car, you get a pang of jealousy. You get angry and have the urge to run over there and bop the owner in the face. Why? Because every client they sell to represents one less car that you can sell, so obviously, they’re sucking up all the clients.
But even if you had a severely limited number of customers that would buy cars, to the point where this rival dealer could saturate the market, which is highly unlikely, you’d still have to address the underlying control belief. This belief states that the ONLY way you can get rich is to sell a lot of cars. This is the only channel through which you’re going to allow that money to come to you. The Universe has an infinite number of ways to bring you what you want. It’s not restricted to this car dealership. You’re the one who’s creating that restriction. In thinking that this is the only way that you can get the money you want, and that your success is being threatened by this other dealership, your jealousy is going to be triggered every time they sell a car.
But it’s not actually the selling of the cars that’s causing the negative emotion. The negative emotion is being caused by the control issues and the beliefs of scarcity.
Envy is also triggered by seeing someone who has something that you want, but it doesn’t have anything to do with scarcity and control. It has more to do with an underlying issue of unworthiness – basically a belief that you can’t get whatever it is that you want.
Let’s say that you’re a bit overweight and you want to get thin. When you see someone else who is thin, you experience envy. It’s not jealousy. You don’t somehow think that their thinness diminishes your chances of losing weight. (Generally, we have an easier time understanding the scarcity issue when it comes to something arbitrary like thinness, than when it comes to something material such as cars or money.) This other girl in the street being thin isn’t going to diminish your chances of being thin. But it still makes you feel bad. Why? Because as you see her skinny butt walking down the street, it triggers an underlying belief. Perhaps you believe that you can’t lose weight, that you have no control over your body, that you can’t also be thin or that you’re never going to be thin. These are horrible thoughts, and it’s THESE thoughts that are causing the negative emotion, not her thinness.
You could also be envious of someone who has money. You could have an underlying belief that you don’t deserve to be rich, or that being rich is bad in some way. On the one hand, you desperately want to be rich, but on the other hand, you have a belief that you can’t have money or that you don’t deserve it. That creates a clash, a vibrational discord, and it’s this discord that’s causing your negative emotion.
So, when you experience envy or jealousy, or even both at the same time, dig down into your feelings and try to find out what thoughts you’re thinking at that moment that are causing your negative emotion. It’s not because you’re a horrible person and you don’t want others to have nice things. There’s a deep rooted belief in there somewhere that can be released; and once it’s released, you’re not going to experience the negative emotion anymore. Not only that, but you’ll open up the energy, so the Universe can bring you what you want.
Was this video helpful? How do you deal with envy or jealousy? Share in the comments!