|Don't Hold All Muslims
Responsible for Men Who Misuse Quran, Beat Women
by Summer Hathout
Published in LA Daily Journal
Whenever I tell people that I speak to Muslim audiences about domestic
violence, I get the same reaction: "Wow, you must have your work cut
out for you." Why do I get this response? Why do people think Islam
is violent? Why do people think Muslims are misogynists?
The answers elude me. Are there violent Muslims? Yes. Are there
misogynistic Muslims? Yes. Are there violent Christians, Jews and
atheists? Yes. Are there misogynistic Christians, Jews and atheists? Yes.
So why aren't those groups as misunderstood and vilified as Islam? Is the
answer as simple as racism and prejudice? I hope not.
We, as Americans, have a very deep misunderstanding of Islam. How do I as
a Muslim-American female attorney rectify the problem? First, I don't hide
who I am. I try to let people know that I am not the "exception to
Islam" - I didn't somehow end up being a decent person despite my
religion. All the good things that I am are because of Islam. Second, I
try to inform others about Islam (this includes Muslims). Third, I don't
let the constant prejudice deter me.
When I speak about domestic violence, I explain to my audience that
violence against women is not the monopoly of any single group. Studies
indicate that domestic violence affects all segments of society
irrespective of race, religion or socioeconomic status.
With this premise in mind, how is the issue of domestic violence different
for Muslims? Some Muslims believe that the teachings of Islam allow wife
beating in certain circumstances (this number is small but it is this
segment of Muslims that gets the most media attention). Why does this
small group of Muslim men think they can beat their wives? The answer lies
in one word: daraba. This word, or its derivatives, is used in the Quran
in several places (Muslims believe the Quran is the divine word of God,
revealed to Muhammad, a prophet, through the angel Gabriel).
One translation of Chapter 4, Verse 34 of the Quran states, in part,
"And as for those women whose ill-willed rebellion you have reason to
fear, admonish them first; then leave them alone in bed; then beat them;
and if thereupon they pay you heed, do not seek to harm them."
(Muhammad Asad translation).
Another translation of the same verse states, "As for women you feel
are averse, talk to them persuasively; then leave them alone in bed; and
go to bed with them when they are willing. If they open out to you, do not
seek an excuse for blaming them." (Ahmed Ali translation).
Note the differences in the translation of the Arabic word daraba. One
translation indicates beating while the other indicates consensual sexual
relations. These are only two meanings of daraba. The same word also can
mean to separate, leave or depart.
The Quran itself uses daraba 16 times, and in nine of those instances, the
meaning is to separate or depart.
Note also that we have not discussed the meaning of women's ill-willed
rebellion or aversion, according to the Quran, that would lead a man to
take the steps outlined in Chapter 4, Verse 34. That conduct (regardless
of how one interprets daraba) is an issue of debate among Islamic thinkers
Moreover, the general principles of a relationship are unambiguously
stated in Chapter 30, Verse 21 of the Quran: "Another of God's signs
is that he created mates out of your own kind so that you may get peace of
mind from them, and has put love and compassion between you. Verily there
are signs in this for those who reflect."
Which interpretation of daraba is more popular? Unfortunately, the one
that connotes beating. But we need to consider why that translation is
more popular while ones that are more in tune with the flow of the verse
and the overall teachings of Islam are not.
Islam was introduced to Arabian society more than 1,425 years ago. That
society, like the rest of the world at that time - and much of today's
world - was dominated by a patriarchal elite power structure. That power
structure did not take kindly to the advent of Islam, in particular the
Islamic teachings of equality among all people, including women and
The teachings of Islam posed a threat to the Arabian power structure,
which had not encountered a similar threat to its very existence. Aside
from persecuting the early followers of Islam, the power elite needed to
dilute the teachings of Islam.
Unfortunately for women, much of the corrosion in Islam's message
pertained to issues related to women. Why? Historically women have been
easy targets; it was an easy way for the powerful to ensure they
maintained control over at least one segment of society.
The subjugation of women is important on a number of societal levels for
the power elite.
Once women are excluded from the potential power base on a societal level,
the next logical step is to exclude them from decision making or power at
the domestic level.
As women are oppressed in the microcosm of the home, the battles needed to
overcome that tyranny overshadow the battle for equality in the macrocosm
of society, and women are thus relegated to a status of second-class
citizen or worse amongst less-informed Muslims who live in a tribal-like
To those of us who know Islam and the Quran, violence against women is so
antithetical to the teachings of Islam that we look at those who use our
religion against us as misguided, misinformed or malevolent.
Summer Hathout is a prosecutor in Los Angeles and an activist for women's