My hands were so cold it hurt as the wind whipped around me, I pulled my jacket tighter around me, as my tears trickled down my face in a slow stream the wind would once again blow leaving cold red marks to show where the tears had once been. The cold and the pain I was feeling on the outside was nothing to what was going on within me. Even though I had tightened my jacket as tight as it would go inside was empty and chilled like my soul had been frozen. I just wanted someone to hold me close and tell me everything was alright and to melt the ice cold feeling inside me. I should have known nothing would be good for ever, I should have known that everyone was going to hurt me eventually and I should have known that life was about to give me a bracing reality check. I felt angry at everyone who had ever hurt me, the tears I cried were different now they were hot and full of hatred. What had I ever done to deserve this, did I do something wrong in a past life? Nothing was fair, this world is a cruel place where only the cold and heartless survive and as my heart was bit by bit being eating away by my grief, I knew that soon, I would be like the rest of the shells of life that walked around on the surface of the world alive but not truly living. The emptiness grew and I found the emptiness inside me was more unbearable then the pain and I didnít know how to stop it. As I look back I see and wonder why did we all pretend for so long, why did we hide all our insecurities behind the smiling mask which hid what we truly felt. The cold hard concrete of the pavement beneath me was harsh and unforgiving like the people who had made it. Those were the people who had covered the life and beauty of the land in something false and unnatural. Nothing was as it should be everything that surrounded me was wrong and I was suffocating in it. Why did humans have this need to hide what was real, to hide the true beauty for something they think people would like more?