Re: Angry and bitter all the time.
lack of sleep will kill you. irregular sleep can ruin your life. there is a reason sleep deprivation is a method of torture -- it works.
doesn't matter for the short term if you use sleeping pills to get the job done. pills will not give you quality sleep but you gotta start somewhere.
the thing about not sleeping is it actually starts giving personality disorder symptoms. cranky, jarred, jumpy feelings for minor sleep deprivation. mild paranoia and the paradoxical feeling of even feeling like you don't need sleep and cannot get tired when you are severley deprived. anger and lack of emotional control and depression are all intertwined.
make a POINT of getting yourself into bed and turn OFF all the lights. there's a part of the brain that needs as much darkness as possible for the brain to register that it has had sleep. make it your #1 project and i guarantee other stuff will improve. no one can function without it, and once you're having insomnia it's a hard cycle to break. i'm saying, make this your major thing you gotta fix and treat yourself well about this. make a big distinction between day and night, like don't half fall asleep reading a book and with the lights on. try to do something to get yourself tired like take a hot shower a half hour before your target time. if you can afford it, i'd get some tylenol pm. it's not great and you might wake up after 3-4 hrs, but like i was saying, if you can get into the habit of even having a bedtime, well that's your start.
it may take weeks to get it going, but keepchipping away at it and don't allow yourself any naps in the day. anger and depression won't be cured, but at least you'll have a fighting chance in hell of getting those to improve once you get your inner sleep clock back on track.
been there. pls write a progress report if you can.