Coming Next Month in the Presitigious Journal:
- A new virus has been discovered that explains why escalators are out of order half the time.
- The theory of aeronautics is called into question with a controversial study claiming that planes stay up in the air due to voodoo.
- At a gathering of The Association Of Bald Mathematicians at Sardonika University, it was demonstrated beyond doubt that 14 is not a true number. According to the BMA, 13.997 should be substituted for 14, except in February which no one can pronounce.