For a long time, I have been treading a path which is not only unclear but also very uncertain. I have been seeking wisdom; wisdom about things that are clearly visible to us, and things which are mystic. It is amazing to realize that the most common, day-to-day things are as, or more, complex than some of the mystic things. Well, in my journey to seek wisdom, I have tried to find the source of right wisdom. I was seeking something which will show up as a thundering bolt or a dazzling stream of light and enlighten me with some esoteric knowledge about the dharma of cosmos and the secrets of karma calculation formula.
I have been praying and meditating to get that wisdom. And then one day, a thought occurred that turned my journey upside down, which I have to definitely owe to our ancient and mystic language: Sanskrit.
Let me elaborate it here: I have been seeking “Gyan” like a person in darkness seeks light. What is he actually seeking? He is seeking the lack of darkness. Similarly when I am seeking Gyan, I am seeking the lack of “Agyana”. However, for me, and perhaps for many people “Agyana” implied “ignorance”. But what if the word “Agyana” is interpreted like “Ashudha”, where “Ashudha” means that which is not pure? What if acquiring “Gyan” is not an act of acquiring right wisdom but is an act of getting rid of impure wisdom that is already present, that we have acquired through millions of years that have been spent under the watchful shadows of Maya?
This insight did not ring bells of joy or ecstasy, but made me little sad. The reason for that is, before this thought occurred to me, my journey was at least focused. I knew I was seeking something. But now, it requires letting go off all the unnecessary things that I acquired so far, intellectual, mental, and physical things. Unlearning is much complex than learning something new; there are so many sources of information to know new things, but far less to take you through the path of unlearning.
Nevertheless, I have to start treading this path now. I am now attached to the path of letting go until I let to off everything else…