This week, the world was shocked by the news that Actor & Comedian Robin Williams had died at the ripe age of 63. His cause of death was announced the following day as asphyxiation due to hanging himself with his belt. A childhood hero to many, it was no secret that Williams had been battling with depression for quite some time. It seems now, his battle is over.
As usual, when a celebrity such as Williams is well and alive, most people forget his very existence, especially if they’re not making fools of themselves in the lime light on a daily basis like the younger generation of celebrities are doing these days, such as hip pop star Justin Bieber and Canadian Mayor of Tornoto, Rob Ford. As soon as they die, however, everyone suddenly becomes their number one fan again, reciting every single piece of his past cinematic work, passing each and every one off as their favorite movie.
In life, this man mattered less to them than the ant they squished with their shoe on the sidewalk on their way to work this morning. After his death, he became a saint, a role model, a “national treasure” even! We’ve seen this phenomenon many times over, the most notable examples being Whitney Houston, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and my personal favorite, Paul Walker.
A substitute teacher in Jacksonville, Florida has been suspended from her job this week after a student captured photographs of the educator wearing a phallic apparatus and pantomiming graphic, adult-oriented scenarios during class. Sharon Mercer is the 39-year-old substitute teacher who was hired to present a course in sexual education for a group of 6th grade students at Clinton Middle School. The School, which is located in Duval County, five minutes outside of Jacksonville, FL, is occupied by over 200 students, and teaches grades 5 to 9.
The disciplinary action occurred after several photographs of Ms. Mercer’s questionable demonstration was posted onto the popular image site, imgur. The pictures, taken with a student’s cell phone, clearly depict Mercer mimicking lewd gestures of questionable legal, ethical and educational value.
Mercer, who identifies as a bisexual, gender-queer woman, is a proud member of the LGBTQ community, claims she did nothing wrong by portraying these acts for her class, and that the students left school far more enlightened than they had been prior to the days lesson.
I have a universal truth that I would like to impart upon you, fine denzines of the World Wide Web. A truth which I expect many to rebuff, or even attempt to contradict outright. But despite your lamentations to the contrary, this fact remains irrefutable: Americans love to see their celebrities succumb to horrendous fates.
Is it our bitter and vicarious human nature that causes us to rubber-neck life’s proverbial car wrecks? When one of our champions, a person we’ve raised to the greatest heights of acclaim, passes away in a foolish and pathetic manner, we all secretly rejoice while circling their putrefied carcass like a swarm of drama-hungry vultures.
And rightfully so, for it was we, the fans, who had fattened them up for the slaughter. These celebs, gorged on our attention and granted relative Godhood during their lives; They owe us, their loyal worshipers, everything. We demand that each grubby little posthumous secret be laid bare, so that we can wallow blissfully in all the trifling, dishonorable details surrounding their pitiful deaths.
Jeffrey Dahmer was an innocent child when he took the life of his first victim; A bright-eyed doe, shot while hunting with his father. It was during these weekend trips that appalling acts of animal cruelty were committed, warping his young psyche to the point of no return. The seeds of ruthlessness which were planted on these bloodthirsty excursions would eventually kindle a desire within the young Dahmer to murder human beings. The result was a lust for sadism that went on to claim the lives of 17 men between the years of 1978 to 1991.
After the onset of puberty, adolescent Dahmer’s interest in slaughter melded with his budding sexuality. His mother’s indifference and his father’s overbearing attitude forged the boy into a full bore homosexual by the time he reached 13 years of age. This farrago of violence, self-hatred and confusion quickly gave way to severe depression and problems with alcoholism early in life. These issues would continue to plague him until his death in 1994.