*loses 5 lbs* I don’t see a difference
*gaines 0.003 lbs* Why did I let myself go
Some people have sex and that’s okay
Some people don’t have sex and that’s also okay
but what’s NOT okay is putting fucking ketchup in your god damn mac and cheese
THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD IS SEEING PEOPLE SMILING BECAUSE OF YOU
we’re being faced with a serious issue.
there is only 1 sarcasm left
now we’ve got to use it wisely. please, for the love of god, think before you speak. it’s gotta be good.
yeah okay, i’ll be sure to do that
in movies when kids sneak out through their windows and im just like why dont you have screens in your windows who doesnt have screens in their windows what do you just let bees and bugs and birds and shit fly into your room what the fuck
this is why you guys had the black plague.
are u ever mean as fuck in ur head and u aint wanna be and u’d never say it out loud but that one voice in ur head is a total asshole and u feel bad for even thinking it and u wonder if thats how u rly are
modern au where sirius discovers memes and calls remus “moon moon”